Here and Now

Pondering....

2012-01-07T12:43:00.002-07:00

"But if the discontent with your present situation is deep, recurrent, and lasting, and if that discontent grows in Bible-saturated soil, God may be calling you to a new work. If, in your discontent, you long to be holy, to walk pleasing to the Lord, and to magnify Christ with your one, brief life, then God may indeed be loosening your roots in order to transplant you to a place and a ministry where the deep spiritual ambitions of your soul can be satisfied. It is true that God can be known and enjoyed in every vocation; but when he deploys you from one place to the next, he offers fresh and deeper drinking at the fountain of his fellowship. God seldom calls us to an easier life, but always calls us to know more of him and drink more deeply of his sustaining grace. "

- John Piper

Pod Picture

2012-01-07T12:38:00.002-07:00

My BMC family. So fun to work with :)

A Blurrrr

2012-01-06T18:50:00.000-07:00

I’m not sure that this blog will ever be up to date. Sigh. Little blurps here and there just to connect the dots for now.

Made it successfully through the first semester of RN school. Intense. About quit at week 6 but pressed through and my perspectives changed. So much I could have written about but was so mowed over with homework that there were very few moments to blog.

Now I am nearing the last few precious hours of my 4 week break and will hit the books again on Tuesday. One more year and if all goes well I will be able to take the boards in January 2013. Then what? Not entirely sure, but I am excited at the possibilities.

Hopefully my dots will be more closely placed as the year progresses….no guarantees though.

Wallflower

2011-12-28T08:16:00.006-07:00

"Wallflower, come dance with me,

Left over, you're just what I need.

Broken One, you'll be the queen of my heart." - - "Wallflower" by Laura Woodley

My Beast

2011-09-11T15:08:00.002-06:00

Making Donuts

2011-09-05T13:35:00.003-06:00

Because I have the day off. Because I haven't made donuts in years. Because it is a crisp fall day. Because I can study better when there is something baking. Because I like donuts. Because I can :)

RN School

2011-09-03T08:44:00.004-06:00

The summer has flown by and once again I am back in class. My class consists of 18 LPN's with a diverse background of experience - from ER to L&D to Psych to office nursing. I am really looking forward to working with these people and being able to share from the variety of our resources. I have two amazing instructors - 1 was a previous LPN instructor whom I adored and the other 1 I had never met before but she is very kind and I really anticipate that she will challenge and encourage me along the way. This program is not without its intimidations, however. Many old fears from my previous LPN program experience have taunted me. I never really became confident in many of the typical nursing "skills" and have been working in an office for 8 years so I haven't had to practice them. Now I have about 6 weeks to become competent enough to get "signed off". In addition, although I only have class one day a week, the homework required is "full time". I am excited for the challenge and I am so blessed that this time around I have strong resources available for assistance. It is pretty handy to have doctors, nurses, pharmacists, PA's, lab techs, etc as some of your best friends :)

So, 15 months from now...in 12/2012 I will have overcome many challenges and grown significantly and will hopefully be on my way to taking the boards! And, hopefully, I can keep this blog updated occasionally so I can look back and see my progress :)

A few pictures from Maui 2011

2011-07-16T11:40:00.002-06:00

Waimoku Falls at the end of the

Pipiwai Trail in Haleakala National Park
Lahina from Lanai island
Wai'anapanapa Coast Hike
Hana Hidaway, 5 minutes following a rainstorm at 5:30am
Waihe's Ridge Trail hike

Getting on a Jet Plane

2011-06-19T05:34:00.003-06:00

I can't believe I am embarking on yet another incredible adventure. Well, technically, everyday is an adventure, but some days are more than others. Today I am going to Maui. Again. I am so blessed and thankful for the opportunity to visit such an amazing place.

Flying to the Tetons

2011-06-05T23:49:00.005-06:00

Flying over the top of the Tetons in a small single engine plane was an amazing experience. It came at just the right time too. Like I said in my previous post, I have been feeling kind of overwhelmed with the task of learning to fly. I am loving every minute of it, but at the same time I have this fear of failing at it. Anyway, the trip we took today certainly encouraged me to continue pursing the process.

At 0700, Dale, Liz, and I met up at the Red Baron Aviation center at the Idaho Falls airport. It was just a tad chilly but clear with no wind. Perfect morning for anything, especially flying. Liz is also a student pilot with about as many hours as I have. Although this flight would not count as "official" Sport pilot log hours since we were flying a four seater Cessna 172 XP (I think that was the model), Dale wanted each of us to have the opportunity to sit up front. In order for this to happen, Liz and I would have to perform a "midair gymnastic feat" by trading places in flight. Now the cockpit of a single engine plane isn't terribly roomy and we certainly didn't want to jar the pilot off course by kicking him in the head, so we practiced our maneuver while safely on the ground. Luckily we are both flexible and although it was a bit awkward, we all three agreed that it could be done.

We started off with a preflight prayer, which I am so appreciative of. I love having a flight instructor who commits his way to the Lord :) I started out in the back seat and as we took off I thoroughly enjoyed seeing Idaho Falls from the air. The river, well above flood stage, churned like chocolate milk over the falls. Dale turned us East as we gained altitude and headed for the Tetons. I started snapping pictures of lush green valley fields and the windmills that, as Dale said, "sprouted like asparagus" from the rolling foothills just beneath us. Our course went straight for the Grand Teton, gaining about 300-500 feet a minute (I think). Ririe Dam soon came into view off to the south of the plane. It didn't look as full as I expected it to be, but there was certainly a lot of water! The green "snake" river slithered along the base of the mountains on the west side of Driggs. I couldn't believe how much snow remained packed upon the mountains. I can imagine how this will affect the flood stage in a few weeks when it all melts. Within a few minutes the Victor/Driggs valley was visible and its little airstrip was at the plane's north side. By this time we were about 12,500 feet and still climbing in preparation for the ascent across the Teton mountain range.

"Ok, time for the switcharoo", Dale announced over the headsets. I wasn't sure if it would really work, but Liz slid easily into the backseat next to me and I carefully stepped over the backrest and settled myself into position in the front. It all went rather smoothly, thank goodness. We were nearly upon the Tetons at that point. Dale showed me where to point the plane as we prepared to cross over the range. At that point I asked Liz to take pictures with my camera because I was a little distracted. It was so amazing to be nearly 14,000 feet and experience the Teton's perspective as they gazed into horizon beyond. At the crest, I was stunned to see the Grand Teton at eye level, with all of it crevices, points and edges, and looking downward, was Jenny Lake nestled at its feet. We gently circled around the face of the mountain and focused our direction westward. Jackson Hole was seen in the distance to the south. The air was surprisingly smooth and stable.

This Cessna had a built in GPS system that Dale pointed out and it was cool to have a coordinate system to confirm that we were flying on course (of course Dale would have made sure of that anyway :) Once we transversed back across the south side of the range, Dale dropped our power and trimmed back the plane so we began a descent of about 300 feet a minute, which would gradually bring us back to the appropriate elevation when we got back to Idaho Falls. The flight back was just as green and lush as going up, but we were slightly more south and had a better view of the Ririe Reservoir and the windmills. Idaho Falls came into view and Dale took full control to set us up for landing. He made the runway and landed us smoothly back on the ground and taxied us back to park the plane. It was 0836. Once we tied down the plane I gave a post flight prayer and we took crew photos. So much fun.

It was a perfect experience, and I am so thankful for serving a God who loves to fascinate me :D

Flying

2011-06-03T18:49:00.003-06:00

Flying has always fascinated me. For my 16th birthday my dad arranged a flight for me with one of his work buddies that was a pilot. That was the first time I had ever been in an airplane and I loved it. We flew to a Yellowstone airstrip and then back to Idaho Falls. At that point I decided I wanted to get my pilot's license...however, I was still in highschool and lessons were very expensive so I dropped it.

I have thought about pursing it several times over the past 15 years, but it always seemed out of my reach. Besides, what was the point of getting the license if I couldn't afford the plane, insurance, and gas.

I don't remember how he knew that I wanted to fly, because I hadn't brought it up for years, but an acquaintance of mine dropped me an email in February and said that he working on getting his Sport Pilot instructor rating and needed a "pretend" student to take up for practice. Of course I jumped at the opportunity. It was a cold, crisp winter day but it was clear and calm. Dale took me up in the Zodiak and he practiced being an instructor and I pretended to be a student. I was hooked. I don't think he intended to capture me as an actual student, but after that flight I realized that my goal to be a pilot might be attainable.

Dale flys out of the Blackfoot airport a lot, and that was very convenient for me since I live about 3 minutes away from it. He took me up a couple more times for practice in a 1956 Ercoupe and it was a blast. I also started going to the meetings of the local chapter of the EAA. I expressed my interest in working on my pilot's license and he agreed to take me on as an "official" student once he became a licensed instructor. I want to fly as often as possible, but I decided that I could only afford about 2 lessons a month. Flying is not an inexpensive endeavor but I know that if I wait until I have "enough" money it will never happen. I decided that this pursuit had to be about the process and not the end result.

I had my 4th official lesson this afternoon. I have loved every lesson and am learning so much. I am feeling very overwhelmed right now though. There is so much to remember and coordinate and be aware of...I don't know if I really even have the aptitude to be a pilot. Anyways, it is a journey and I hope that I can finish what I have started. It is encouraging to remember this is the exact same way I felt halfway through nursing school. In fact, it is the same way I felt when I first learned to drive. I successfully made it through both of those!

Dale, Liz (another student pilot), and I are flying to the Tetons on Sunday morning if the weather is good. I am really looking forward to it! Hopefully I will take some pictures to post later!

So, here's to the process!

It Dropped in My Lap

2011-05-29T17:05:00.002-06:00

See that picture, at the top of the blog? I get to go back there in 3 weeks. I simply can't believe it. Eight years ago I went to Maui and spent 2 fascinating months there and have wanted to return ever since.

I received an email last Thursday..."the coffee harvest is really heavy this year...it is ripening faster than in past years and I find myself with a huge crop and not enough pickers..." "Hmm", I thought, "I have two weeks off at the end of June. No school. No homework. Paid vacation time from work. Some savings for a rainy day. The opportunity came to me, I wasn't out looking for it." Seemed like something I should at least consider.

So, with prayers and counsel and nothing but green "go ahead" lights, I booked an unbelievably affordable round trip ticket from Idaho Falls to Maui. In fact, it was cheaper to fly out of I.F. than SLC or Boise. Unheard of. I will be working at Maui Mountain Coffee picking organic fair trade coffee beans. ;-D and in my time off I hope do a lot of hiking and maybe drive to Hana, oh, and beach time too! Maui is a little drop of heaven to me.

6 Months Later....

2011-05-19T20:07:00.003-06:00

Wow, it has been almost six months since I blogged last! There are several things I wants to catch up on, but I can't do it right now! More to come...

1-1-11 Happy New Year!

2011-01-01T21:34:00.005-07:00

Crepes do amazing things to people....

Trying to get this clan (most not included in this pic) together at one given time is a bit of a challenge...
However, if one mentions "Jenny is making Crepes for New Year's brunch", miracles do happen :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

2010-11-19T15:58:00.001-07:00

So thankful this ISN'T how pumpkin pie is made :D

Thought Provoking....

2010-09-10T12:09:00.001-06:00

I ran across this quote today:

"Men go abroad to wonder at the heights of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motions of the stars, and they pass by themselves without wondering."

Saint Augustine

My New Toy

2010-09-10T10:03:00.001-06:00

Too bad it is only as smart as its user!

Jenny Lake

2010-09-06T18:42:00.003-06:00

Going to bed last night, I had decided to drive up to Jenny Lake today. I had pretty much caught up my homework on Saturday night and Sunday. Sunday's weather turned out to be rather crumby, which was fine with me since I couldn't spend much time outside anyway. However, the weather today was perfect. It did freeze last night and I had to scrape my windshields. It didn't get much about 50 in the Tetons, but the air was crisp and clear and there was no wind. After loading up all my stuff and cleaning the condo, I picked up a coffee at "Elevated Grounds" and took off town toward Jackson.

Had I know that I would have to pay a fee to get into the park, I probably wouldn't have gone. Rather than turn around once I got that far, I paid the fee and drove on into to Teton National Park. From there, I pretty much just looked at the map and drove around. I loved every minute of it. Hopefully I can use my pass next weekend to go to Yellowstone :)

Math in the Mountains

2010-09-05T10:06:00.003-06:00

I had the wonderful opportunity to stay in a friend's condo out of town this weekend. At first, I had decided not to go because I have too much homework. However, I got thinking about it and decided that I could still go and do homework while I was there. So here I am! Enjoying the Lord's goodness to me and the change of scenery. He knows what I need and I am so thankful that He is teaching me to be a little more spontaneous and receive the blessings that He wants to give me. I think so many times He is offering things to me, but I don't know how to receive them.

Anyway, although I still have hours of College Algebra homework to do, I am so thankful I am up here, at the base of the Tetons, enjoying the time I have. :-)

I Like :)

2010-09-04T18:26:00.000-06:00

This soda is delightful!

O Deer

2010-07-24T15:35:00.001-06:00

This was in my backyard 2 weeks ago...

Summer Break

2010-07-23T10:31:00.003-06:00

Wow! I haven't updated this thing for ages! That's kinda sad. Maybe I need to go on another trip overseas so that I can reestablish the habit of blogging :)

Someone said the other day, "summer is half over". I'm like, "No! I have been in school for 8 weeks. I haven't even started summer yet!" Actually, I have officially been on summer break for one week now. This is the first real break from school that I have had in 13 months. Even while on Christmas and Spring vacation from EITC, I still had my U of I online classes that I had to work on. It feels kinda weird to be home and not have the pressure of studying. In fact, now that I have had a few days off, I am excited to get started again. I don't want to lose the momentum that has already been established. However, I probably should relax and enjoy the next month because next semester I am taking my two most dreaded classes....College Algebra and Speech. Ug.

To add to the "weirdness" of having a break, my "family" moved to Boise 3 weeks ago. That has been tough. I have been in Blackfoot almost 14 years with them and now they are far away. They have truly been a big part of my life and now I am being forced to really find my own identity in the Lord apart from them. Yeah, Boise is only 4 hours away so I can still visit, but I can no longer pop in on a Friday morning for coffee or hang out after work.

I'm still wrestling with what I am doing in Blackfoot. I like my job, I love the people I work with, and now that I have moved to an upstairs apartment, I love where I live. I am so blessed and thankful for what I have. I just can't seem to find a sustained state of peace where I am not wondering if I am missing God by making the decision to stay. I just keep plugging along day after day and nothing is changing. People around me are getting married, having babies, and basically going somewhere in life. I am going to school to do something that I don't really particularly enjoy, but somehow I think it will open doors for me down the road. I am trying to be faithful with what I have at my hand to do and be content with this prolonged season of life. It just gets discouraging when nothing changes...

Regardless of what I feel or see with my natural eyes, I have to stay in place of faith and trust that the Lord sees and knows. He is faithful and good to me. I may feel stuck in the waiting room, but He is after my heart and is more concerned about the process of trust rather than answering a prayer. But perhaps the trust may have to come by dropping everything here and doing something crazy....

Taking a Moment...

2010-05-02T19:20:00.002-06:00

"I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day."

Hi

2010-02-28T13:50:00.000-07:00

I'm here :-D

Mac

2010-02-05T16:42:00.003-07:00

Well, I did it. I bought myself a Macbook today. I am so excited! I have always wanted one, but never had the courage (well, mostly the money), to switch from a PC to a Mac. Everyone I talked to about it over the years said they would never go back to a PC after using a Mac. Someone made the comment that Mac is Zion and PC is Babylon. May be a pretty true analogy. The Kingdom vs the World System. Watch this:

Thoughts on January

2010-01-17T16:51:00.002-07:00

In years past, I think I have unconsciously dreaded January. When it first starts getting cold here in October, it is exciting because there is the whole holiday season to look forward to with all it's cheer and preparations and family time. It goes by fairly quickly, especially with all the events scheduled. However, at least in my mind, there is this looming shadow of "January, February, and March" in the distance. January especially seems dark, cold, and just plain boring. This year I have determined to look at it a different way.

January is a time when things seem to be dead in the natural. At least in this area of the world, there is nothing green. It is cold, and often covered in ice. Morning after morning we go to work in the dark and come home in the dark. Ice on the windshield every morning is the constant greeting. There is no emotional "pick me up" to temporarily prop up our vitamin D deprived bodies. Finances are generally tight due to the holiday frenzy only weeks before, and the day in and day out drudge seems like a death sentence.

However, this year as I was examining my heart, I found a little green sprout of joy. At least that is what I think it is. It can't be explained any other way. Yes, in my mind, I always "know" that winter will come to an end, both the natural and in the spiritual. But this is different. This is an expectation that I can't understand with my intellect. It is deposit of something fuller that I know is coming. January looks dead and cold. But deep under the earth, there is life and growth and expectation. I love January. It is an exercise of character. When all seems dull and boring and there is no emotional fluff to keep us afloat, that is when our true heart is revealed and we see if we are truly rooted and grounded in love. We develop deep foundations as we walk out the process of life and godliness even when no one sees.

I am so thankful for January seasons. I pray that the hopes and dreams and purposes that seem dead would produce much fruit as they are tended to, even in the darkness and cold, by the Author and Perfector of our faith.

Here and Now

2010-01-12T20:25:00.004-07:00

I love updating my blog...can't tell by looking at it right now though. I haven't written anything since Novemeber? That can't be! How did that happen? O well, here I am again anyway :-)

Back to school tomorrow. Second half of Anatomy and Physiology. I am also taking an online Pyscholgy class and finishing the online Algebra class.

Came through last semester with a 4.0. People keep saying that I must be really smart, but I think it has more to do with working really hard. I know in my mind that grades aren't really that important, but I really want to do well and put forth my best work. If I get less than an A, I know that I could have done better. I often wish that I could just not care what I get, seems that the people who do that have more fun. Anyways, I think maybe that is just who I am. I like school and I like learning and I do well in a classroom. I might as well excel at what I do well and not compare myself with other's expectations, or lack of.

A year ago, I was planning a trip to Rochester, MN for a job interview. I was leaving Blackfoot. I was leaving Idaho. I was trying to obey what I felt the Lord was prompting me to do. But I am here. I was offered the job, and for more than I make now. But the Lord told me not to take the job. That doesn't make sense. Why go through all that - the applying for jobs, the Minnesota nursing license, the plane ticket, the hotel rooms, the rental cars, the cold of Rochester, the turmoil of telling my boss that I was leaving...not sure where, but I was leaving.

And I am here. "This is the way, walk in it". The illuminated letters above the door option called "Blackfoot". But why Lord? I thought I was on another adventure with You? I thought we were going somewhere and you were opening NEW doors for me to walk through. You said Blackfoot was too small for me. But nevertheless, I want to obey you. Not only obey you, but trust you, even if I am not hearing you right. Trust you to lead me because my heart is yours.

So here I am. Location is not the point. Proximity to large populations is not important. Living in the Kingdom is the focus. Blackfoot may be too small, but when I am seeing with the eyes of my spirit and living before the Lord, physical location is unimportant to Him. If I can cultivate a heart that is His and His alone, the world is at my door step. He can take me where He wants me, and bring people to me for His Kingdom purposes.

I am happy to be here. I love school. I love my job and people I work with. I find little things every day that bring joy to my heart. I like who I am becoming. I think that God is doing a good work in me and He will get what He deserves from me.

So here I am, living not in regret or disappointment, but in thankfulness and expectation. Here and Now, for the glory of God...

Home Today

2009-11-06T08:14:00.002-07:00

It is so nice to have a day off. My "work week" is wrapped up and although I have a lot of homework to do, I think I will actually have some time to settle into my new apartment and spend time in prayer. I have been consumed lately with keeping up with things at work and getting homework tasks done. Only 5 more weeks of this semester left...wow. I have registered for the second year of Anatomy and Physiology at EITC and I will take Psychology through the online program next semester. I am a bit behind in my online math class and I hope to get that caught up between semesters. It is my most challenging class so far.

Transcription and Translation

2009-10-03T18:07:00.000-06:00

Up for Air

2009-09-20T21:59:00.006-06:00

It has been an intense previous weekend and week studing for two back to back tests - the first of the semester. First tests are always fun because you really have no idea of the testing "flavor" of the particular instructor, so you have no idea what to really expect. I studied very hard and got an A- on both tests. I felt like I did better, but it is what it is. Since it was test week, both instuctors let us out of class right after the tests, so there was no assigned homework or chapters to study. I had planned to take the weekend and write a paper that is due in 3 weeks, however, between picking up a few extra weekend shift hours and just plain laziness, the paper is still unwritten. I do feel that I connected with family and friends and that is more important at this point anyway. The paper will wait for me.

Tonight, I calendered all my upcoming tests and assignment due dates, and it seem that I will not have anymore "free" time for the next 2 months. I guess it is good that I came up for some air before diving back into it over my head this week. My current house sold, and I have to be out on October 31st, so I will also have to moving the end of next month. Not fun when you are in the middle of a semester. Oh well. Time to strap it on...

13

2009-09-13T21:49:00.002-06:00

Today was the first day of my 13th year of living in Blackfoot. I was just 18 when I moved here. Wow. I can't believe I'm still here...

Fascinated

2009-08-28T22:12:00.003-06:00

Wow, what a whirlwind of a week. I can't believe it is late Friday night already. Sigh...

Classes have been great. Thanks to my gracious friends at work who covered me having to leave early, I arrived at class on time! This will have to continue for another 15weeks, however, so hopefully my schedule will continue to cooperate :-)

I get to play with real-live microscopes - Yeigh! I think I have waited my whole life to be in class where they teach you how to dissect things and look at them under magnification. I remember being home schooled and being jealous of my friends in public school who had biology classes and labs. I think I had to get by with a Fisher Price version. LOL. Not anymore man. I have the real deal. In both classes even!

I really like both instructors. My Micro teacher is pretty laid back and has a great sense of humor. He threatened to dance to any cell phone ringer tone that happened to go off in class. I might have to test that offer…He also combined all 16 Saturday labs into 4 all day Saturday labs, so now I have some free Saturdays that I didn’t expect to have. My A&P instructor is more serious, but she is an amazing lecturer and obviously has a thorough knowledge and passion in what she teaches. I suspect A & P will be a bit more challenging because of her testing style, but I think I will do well.

The human body is fascinating, even on a cellular level. I almost had tears come to my eyes while we were discussing the complexity of just the cellular wall! Indeed, we are fearfully and wonderfully made by a very imaginative Creator. I am pretty excited about these classes. I took a version of both Micro and A & P to get my LPN, but had to retake the "improved" version so they would apply to my RN. I don't regret either opportunity.

Math is going well. Working on slopes and y-intercepts. Not sure how that applies to anything in particular, but what the heck. It is kinda fun. I guess. When you really think about it…

Changes

2009-08-23T20:35:00.002-06:00

So, I am going to try this again. Last night, Stephanie was like, "You never blog anymore."

"Yes I do!" I exclaimed.

"Well", she said, "last time you blogged was July 26, and it was a whole month the time before that."

So, here I am again. Hopefully I will follow through. Not that anybody reads this blog, but I do really like having an online journal. Facebook is fun for connecting, but not very good for writting much.

Microbiolgy and A&P classes start this week. I am already well into Intermediate Alegbra. I am praying that I have not bitten off more than I can chew. I know people work full time and go to school full time AND raise kids and run a household all the time. I know that I am not really trying to do anything extraordinary, but it is more than I have tried to take on before. I really want to maintain a 4.0 so I can get scholarships, but we will see how that works out. I am very excited about school. I love learning, and I especially like the subject matter of these courses.

Found out that the house I have been renting all summer sold, so I have to be out by October 31st. I am totally ok with that, I have expected this place to sell and I have been very blessed by being here for the past few months. It is in my heart to find a good room mate for this next season, but I wouldn't mind being on my own either. I would love to have my horse down here with me, but board these days is through the roof.

The Lord knows what I need and when I need it. I am trying to trust Him and not lean on my own understanding. He is good :-)

Brian Regan "Say Eight"

2009-07-26T22:30:00.000-06:00

Transition - Part 3

2009-05-31T18:10:00.006-06:00

For everyone that thinks that I dropped off the face of the earth, I am still here, LOL. I finally have a decent connection to the Internet, so now maybe I can keep posting on a regular basis. We'll see!

I never really posted what I had "in the works", but basically I was moving out of state, and I was going to be there by March / April. I had taken a trip there in January to check it out, and for a job interview. Rochester was amazing in many ways. Mayo Health Systems offered me a job in Owatanna but I really didn't feel right about moving there. There were several other possibilities in the Denver area but out of state tuition was outrageous. I was wrestling with the decision I had made to leave. I continued to pray and seek the Lord for clarity and direction.

One day while I was seeking the Lord, I saw myself in a dark room. I had just closed a door behind me. In this dark place, I saw three doors in a semi circle in front of me. One was to the right, one was to the left, and one was directly in front. The one directly in front of me was cracked open just enough for me to see light coming from it, but not open enough to see what was behind it. The doors to the right and to the left were both dark and closed, yet not uninviting. I decided to step forward and through the door that was exposing light. As I opened the door, a sign above it illuminated and I read the words, "This is the way, walk in it". As the door opened, I expected to see an unknown land, one that I hadn't experienced before. However, my eyes met the familiar place of Idaho, more specifically, the town I live in. But this expression of it was full of purpose and destiny. I saw much that my heart had been longing for being manifested here. At that moment, I experienced a peace and confidence that settled my seeking heart.

I told the Lord that I was willing to stay if He would turn my heart. I didn't want to stay by default, begrudgingly staying because I didn't know what else to do. I wanted to step into the adventure of faith and embrace staying here as fully as I would have embraced moving away. I am excited to continue on the adventure with Him.

So, on a more practical level - I am renting an older 2 bedroom house that is currently for sale. It is simple and has lots of character (in more ways than one) and I am blessed and deeply thankful for the provision. I am also currently taking an online college class and am registered for classes in the fall, which I am trying to coordinate with my more than full time job at the clinic.I should be able to complete my RN degree by fall 2012.

The Call Nashville - Praises Rise by Ramey Whalen

2009-05-09T17:17:00.002-06:00

My voice is the sound of a thousand bells
Hear me nations, sing Israel
My song is the water of the purest well
Hear me heaven, fear me hell
My dance carries thunder from the throne of Yah
Look at me, and know He is GOD!

Let our praises rise like a weapon in Your hand
Let our praises rise O God
Let our praises rise like a weapon in Your hand
Let our praises rise O God

My hands hold the cure for every disease
They're covered in blood and oil and leaves
My laughter and tears create things unseen
Atmosphere changes, God released
My worship is armed with spirit and truth
Sacred, accepted, pleasing to You

God of eternity, wonders and majesty
God of creation, ancient, alive in me
God of all nations, uncharted galaxies
God who is Spirit, alive in me

2009-03-20T15:30:00.000-06:00

SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by Marsha Burns -- March 20, 2009

Because you are in a transitional period, it is imperative that you neither live in the past by dwelling on past events or live in the future by focusing your attention on the days ahead. You must focus your attention on what you are facing at this moment. Ask for wisdom to understand and deal with your current position so that you can make the most of your life now. Living in disappointment, regret or fantasy is a waste of your time and vitality. Release yourself from all rejection, says the Lord. You will only be aware of My guidance and direction when you quiet your mind and emotions. Be still and know that I am God.

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!
Isaiah 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.

2009-03-18T07:19:00.000-06:00

SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by Marsha Burns -- March 18, 2009

Beloved, persevere through your current dilemma or difficulty. It won't do for just any opportunity to present itself; it must be the right circumstance for this juncture that will be the impetus to bring positive change and lasting progress. I will go before you and open the way of breakthrough. Ask for wisdom and trust Me to open doors that no man can shut and to shut doors that no man can open, says the Lord. Be strong and resolute.
Isaiah 52:12 For you shall not go out with haste, nor go by flight; for the LORD will go before you, and the God of Israel will be your rear guard.

2009-02-22T10:16:00.000-07:00

Next Generation Promo Video

2008-12-14T09:21:00.001-07:00

Hot off the press from Paul and Dawson Hunter!

Transitions - Part 2

2008-12-11T20:23:00.004-07:00

For the sake of an update, I have given my thirty day notice on my apartment - I will be out by the end of December. During this season in which people are generally getting into the "Holiday Cheer", I find myself kind of pulled away from the throng of noise and hustle and bustle. I am being forced to delve into a deep place in my spirit to find peace and genuine security and identity in the Lord. That is a good place to be. I am going through all my "stuff" - hehe, I just moved here 2 years ago but I seem to be quite a pack rat. I am getting rid of a lot of stuff - both physically and emotionally. I am laying down dreams, expectations, desires, even promises I believe the Lord has spoken to me. I hold it all with open hands. I am not shutting down my heart, I am simply allowing the Lord to sort through what I have. I am not trying to be content with less, I am believing for more - more of what He wants for me - something bigger than me, something with more purpose than I could come up with on my own. I don't feel very brave or very confident in the decisions I am making, but I am making them in obedience and in faith that He is leading me in the way I should go.

Psalms 32:8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye.

I am taking one step at a time, one day at time. Sitting at Jesus's feet in the early morning hours, not to receive direction necessarily, but to simply draw on His presence and fellowship. I am lost without Him.

Transitions...Part 1

2008-12-04T18:56:00.003-07:00

A dear friend of mine brought a blog post to my attention today. The author of the post was commenting on a quote from a book she had just finished, entitled "Don't Waste Your Life" by John Piper. Although I have not read the book, I identified deeply with the quote.

"But if the discontent with your present situation is deep, recurrent, and lasting, and if that discontent grows in Bible-saturated soil, God may be calling you to a new work. If, in your discontent, you long to be holy, to walk pleasing to the Lord, and to magnify Christ with your one, brief life, then God may indeed be loosening your roots in order to transplant you to a place and a ministry where the deep spiritual ambitions of your soul can be satisfied. It is true that God can be known and enjoyed in every vocation; but when he deploys you from one place to the next, he offers fresh and deeper drinking at the fountain of his fellowship. God seldom calls us to an easier life, but always calls us to know more of him and drink more deeply of his sustaining grace. "

I have hesitated to write much lately due to the transition I am currently in. I know the Lord is leading me out of my comfort zone and into a what feels like a "do you have the courage to take a risk even if you fail?" zone. Sure, I would move to Uganda tomorrow without a hesitation. A three month trip to Indonesia in a few weeks? I'm there, just put me on the plane! But to do what I feel the Lord is leading me to do right now, what I can't write about yet, do I have the courage to trust Him with that? What if the idea of it really puts knots in my stomach? I am following Him down a road I have never been on before. And that quote helped me understand that it is ok for me to be searching deeply...

Blast from the Past

2008-11-20T19:59:00.007-07:00

I was going through some pictures the other night and found some OLD pictures. Kind of entertainting...

I can still pout like this.

Me and my pup dogs

Grade school photo - First Grade???
Cricket...my first "horse". Saved my whole life to buy her for $40. Took me 6 years.

My goats...I really dislike goats now :-D

Seek First...

2008-11-09T08:38:00.005-07:00

"Seek first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you. Therefore do not be anxious..." Matthew 6:33

In the midst of transition and seeking specific direction for this season in my life, I am overwhelmed with the many "open doors" and paths that I could take. This verse in Matthew is often tritely quoted, but there is so much depth to it when embraced and applied. I am dealing with a holy frustration, and I truly want to be pleasing to Him as I make decisions and walk out this process.

Father, I pray for Your Kingdom to be established in and through me as I walk as Your daughter. My heart is set upon seeking You above all else. Even when things are uncertain all around me, You are steadfast and faithful. My hope, my purpose, my desires are all found in You. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be satisfied. Align my heart with Yours, may I find life and joy in Your presence.

Peach Freezer Jam

2008-10-12T21:43:00.005-06:00

My friends have a peach tree that was LOADED with peaches this year. I didn't have tons of time to can them, but I spent all afternoon Saturday freezing them and I made a couple batches of yummy freezer jam.

Fresh off the tree...

Blanching... Ice cold water to remove the skins...
Sugar and pectin...
Jam!!! (Now I just need to make some bread...)

Room Mates

2008-10-04T16:46:00.002-06:00

My friend, and Best Room Mate Ever, is getting married in less than two months. I am thrilled for her and her fiance. We have been here for almost two years. It has been a good season, but it is time for her to move on. She is hard to replace though. Finding a good room mate these days is kind of a challenge. I haven't really "advertised", but I have gotten the word out by word of mouth but the prospects haven't been to promising. I told my landlord too. She came over this morning and told me she "found a room mate for you, his name is so and so." I'm like, "who?". She said, "so and so". "Its a guy?" I asked. "Yeah, he is looking for a room mate cause his just moved out". I'm like, "I need a girl room mate." "O, but he is really nice." I'm like, "Uh, no thanks." I guess you have to be pretty specific with these things...

Trip To San Diego

2008-09-21T20:52:00.003-06:00

Whew! What a weekend! Its been a while since I had a good ol fashioned road trip. My brother, grandpa, mom, and I all piled into grandpa's white Buick for a 1,ooo mile jaunt down I-15 for my cousin's wedding in San Diego. 30 hours in the car over the past three days - I think I am cured of road trips for a while.

We drove to Las Vegas on Friday and stayed the night. I had never been to Vegas before, so my brother took us on a mini tour down on the "strip" and Freemont street. (Not my favorite place in the world). We left at 6am on Saturday and drove the remaining way to San Diego.

The wedding was simple but very beautiful and well worth the investment of the drive. Ian's band played softly in the background and their pastor admonished them - "God brings two together so that they can do more for the Kingdom of God together than they could ever do alone"..., "provoke each other to pursue and cultivate the will of God...", "remind him of what God has placed in his heart.." They pledged their personalized vows under the glow of white lights adorning the willow tree behind them. The reception was on the basketball court that had been transformed into a cozy atmosphere by huge white ball lanterns strung across the court. I am so proud of my cousin and his new bride. I really felt like I could stand in agreement with their decision. It was such a blessing to spend a few hours see my aunt and uncle and other cousin that had flown down from Oregon.

Bright and early at 5am we packed back up the Buick and headed 1,000 miles north, straight home. I would have liked to have spent more more time in San Diego seeing some of the sights (primarily the OCEAN), but maybe some other time....

Congratulations Ian and Julie!!!!

Yellowstone with Friends

2008-09-14T17:11:00.004-06:00

This weekend I have been graced with the company of some very dear friends that I met in Singapore two years ago. They are missionaries to southeast Asia and are based out of Singapore. Deborah and Cornelio came to see me in Blackfoot! And since it was Cornelio's birthday yesterday, we took a surpise trip to Yellowstone National Park. It has been over 8 years since I had been to the park, so it was blast to see it again myself and to show it to people who have never experienced it before. We saw lots of critters - more than I had ever seen in previous visits. Hundreds of buffalo, several elk, deer, cranes, and a coyote.

Cornelio, Deborah, and me - enjoying each other's company.

Enjoying pita sandwiches at Old Faithful

Powder Puff Derby

2008-09-07T23:06:00.006-06:00

This is Barbie, er, I mean Jonnie. She is my sister...

And this is my dad...
And my "little" brother...

Back to Jonnie...
This is Jonnie's car. Well, one of her cars. The other one isn't so, um, pink. And it isn't so noisey.Wow, is that rust?
And this is Jonnie's multi talented husband - Kevin.
And this is Jonnie's first crash that she didn't get a ticket for :-D

Wow sis, all those years of backing into the trash can in the driveway and hitting parked cars in the parking lot really paid off! I had no idea you were practicing for your first demolition derby! She managed to get through without breaking a nail...You go Girl! I am proud of you!

Seasons

2008-09-02T20:09:00.003-06:00

Without knowing what hit me, September burst through the door without a warning. Not that he is an unwelcome guest, as I have always loved the crisp coolness on his breath, but I certainly was unprepared for the sudden arrival. School is back in session, the state fair is half over, and the geese are well on their way of mapping pit stops on their way south. It seems that things all around me are changing and shifting, and yet I remain still. I love the definite seasons of Idaho. The glowing intense romance of Summer always yields to the tap on the back from Autumn requesting the next dance with creation before Winter comes in silent and relentless monotony where life seems so distant. However, Spring, with her sweet song and somewhat unreliable predictability, forces new life and resurrection from the dead, as creation is once again awakened as deep calls unto deep.

Not long ago, as I was sharing my heart with the Lord, I heard myself questioning Him as to why nothing in my life changes. I confess, I have wasted much time in my life comparing myself to others, which is always a no win situation. However, this time I was honestly laying my heart before the Lord seeking Him for direction in my life. It seems, by outward appearance, that everyone around me are "moving on" with life: getting married, having kids, changing jobs, graduating, etc. People are going through their life seasons and I feel like I have been stuck in a rut for the better part of ten years. Why are the things I am believing and praying for not coming to pass? Sometimes the sheer restlessness and frustration bring me to tears.

Then the Lord, in absolute confident reply to my question, "The change is happening in you. You are the change. Continue to believe Me, for it is My work to do in and through you, and what I have begun in you, I am faithful to complete."

Fair Pictures

2008-08-23T17:10:00.004-06:00

The EISF is next week and once again I have entered a slew of photos. Here they are!

Remember Me?

2008-08-23T17:06:00.003-06:00

Yeah, well I am still alive. Been kinda busy all summer and have had a bad case of blogger's block. Plus I haven't been taking many pictures and those have always been my crutch when words fail to type out on the screen. Anyways, hopefully I am over this case of BB and I will keep this more up to date.....we'll see.

Riding

2008-07-15T21:20:00.004-06:00

While I was visiting my mom the past few days, I had the opportunity to ride my horse every day :-) Man, am I sore! I forget how many muscles you have to use to ride a horse. By the fourth ride I was feeling a bit better, but then it was time to come home :-(

Critters

2008-07-15T21:03:00.003-06:00

Neighbors

2008-07-05T17:38:00.003-06:00

Anytime I become disgruntled with my neighbors when they are hollering outside my window at 2am or their dog is barking incessantly in the back yard ( I live in an amphitheater of 4 plexes), I just have to look at this picture and remember how thankful I am not to live in one of these:

This is in China Town, Singapore.

Amazing!

2008-07-01T20:31:00.004-06:00

These are two of the most precious and God fearing men in Uganda, and they are coming to the United States this summer! It is an absolute miracle of God. While I was in Africa in March, I had accompanied Paul and Pam Hunter, Abdu, and Robert to the US Embassy in Kampala. Abdu and Robert were attempting for the 4th and 5th time to be granted a Visa to travel to the U.S. Each time they had be denied, and this time was no exception. We all went back to Jinja that day with heavy hearts but we knew that God was up to something bigger than we could visibly see with our eyes. Read here. It has been reported that less than 10% of applicants for visas to American are granted in Uganda. However, we serve a God who is bigger than statistics and who engages on our behalf to direct our steps and orchestrate His purposes.

Paul wrote in his email update today that, a US senator, who had no personal connection with the Hunter's or Next Generation Ministries, had recently contacted the consular in the Kampala Embassy to personally vouch for Abdu and Robert. The consular then contacted Abdu and requested that he and Robert meet him on July 1st for another interview. Several weeks ago, Abdu and Robert had already filed another application and scheduled an online interview for July 1st! After a few questions in their interview yesterday (July 1st Uganda time), both Abdu and Robert were each granted a Visa to the United States!

"Father, Your ways are higher than our ways! Thank you for bringing glory to Your name in this situation, thank You for Your faithfulness even when we can't see or understand what You are doing. When we lay everything down at Your feet, You are truly free to engage on our behalf and work miracles beyond what we could ask or think. Father, thank you for Abdu and Robert and for their precious families. May Your grace be upon them as they prepare for yet another adventure in their walk with You."

Mr and Mrs Finch

2008-06-26T10:19:00.002-06:00

"Seek from the book of the Lord, and read: Not one of these will be missing; none will lack its mate. For His mouth has commanded, and His Spirit has gathered them." Isaiah 34:16

Green Shake

2008-06-24T19:19:00.002-06:00

Honest, it's really yummy!!!

1/2 Avacodo
1 cup ice
1/2 Cucumber
2 cups Spinach
1/8 tsp Stevia powder
1 cup unsweetened almond milk
1 tsp green powder
Mint leaves

Place everything in a blender and blend until smooth

Nutritous Green Protein Bars

2008-06-19T14:39:00.005-06:00

I have always been a bit of health nut. In years past I have experimented with various eating habits - Vegetarian, Raw foods, Alkalarian, etc. I love eating that way but it does tend to take more time, preparation, and money. Lately, I've been on the "See Food" diet, LOL. I don't recommend that one. I get frusterated with myself because I know how to cook and eat healthy - but I get lazy and eat whatever the Drug Reps so generously bring to work. The Lord is convicting me to once again be proactive in my health and nutrition habits. Browsing my pantry and fridge today, I came up with this recipe. I'll pack these with me to work!

1/2 cup almond butter

1/2 cup tahini

1/4 cup wheat germ

1/2 tsp sea salt

1/2 cup agave syrup

3 TB coconut oil

1/2 cup coconut (unsweetened)

1 cup of ground nuts ( I use a combination of pumpkin, sunflower, hazelnut, etc coarsely chopped in a food processor)

3 TB green powder (I use Supergreens)

1 TB cinnamon

1/4 cup cacao nubs

Mix everything together. Either form into balls, or press into shallow baking pain. Place in fridge until firm. Cut into bars. Store in a cool place.

It's a Bird! No it's a Plane, It's... er, It is a Plane!

2008-06-13T08:43:00.005-06:00

And it is really close to my house! Dang, and those pesticides are in close proximity to my lungs!

"Fire Fall Down"

2008-06-12T11:33:00.004-06:00

The Lipizzaner Stallions

2008-06-09T19:35:00.007-06:00

Saturday around noonish, Matt picked me up for my "surprise" birthday present. Well, it wasn't really a surprise, cause, he, being a typical little brother, can't keep a secret if his life depended on it. Growing up he would somehow or another find a way to discover what we were getting for Christmas, birthday, etc. But that is a different story. I didn't mind knowing this time because it gave me something to look forward to all week.

Anyway, my sweet little brother is all grown up now. Knowing that I love horses, especially well trained ones, he bought tickets to take me to the "World Famous Lipizzaner Stallions World Tour" event. I was totally thrilled to see the stallions perform and especially blessed that my brother was so thoughtful. He even bought me my own Lipizzaner stallion :-D He is sooo cute!

Take a look a the video below to see the Lipizzaners for yourself!

Find more videos like this on www.truveo.com.

PS. Don't tell Chewy that I enjoyed watching the Lipizzaners so much. I don't want him to try to "impress" me and pull an unexpected stunt on the trail!

Back to School

2008-06-02T20:42:00.002-06:00

Ok, I am thinking about going back to school, er, well at least taking a class or two at a time while I continue work full time. Seems as if the Lord isn't going to speak with an audible voice and tell me what to do with my life. I guess some people just know what they were made for or they have a strong desire to do or be something in particular. Someone asked me not too long ago, "If you could do anything, and there were no limitations to money or opportunity, what would you do?" Humm, I have thought and prayed over this question so many times. I can only come up with one thing - and I can't just make that happen. In addition, there are sooo many things that I could do and I have sooo many decisions that I could make, I get overwhelmed and "shut down." I am afraid of making the wrong decision.

So, even though I have not heard a "thus saith the Lord" to go back to school, but it is more like a quiet tug on my heart to take a step in that direction. I believe I have my hand on the thread of His spirit, I can barely feel the the thin line in my fingertips. I don't know where I am going or how long it will take to get there, but I am willing to step out in faith and do what I know to do so that He can direct my steps....

Acclaim Productions

2008-05-20T21:20:00.004-06:00

In previous postings about Uganda, I mentioned Syd and Chad Hair on several occasions. Our excursions to Uganda were planned separately but unbeknowst to either of us, the timing of our trips overlapped. I had the tremendous blessing to travel half way across the world to meet a family that lives not 30 minutes from my front door! Such a small world we live in! Syd has a tremendous mobilization gift - her vision and motivation astounds me. Chad's revelations go deep and he expresses things through vivid cinematography and written language. During their time in Africa, they composed a beautiful music video featuring Lilly Bulamu singing "O Mama Africa" - a song she wrote inviting people to Africa. This video has clips of many of the places I have been and also several of the photos I took. Please take a look at their website at Acclaim Productions and be sure to view the video at the bottom of the page. Enjoy!!!

Priorities

2008-05-15T08:00:00.007-06:00

"Calling multiple times won't expedite the process of asking the doctor, I will ask as soon as I have chance..." I hung up the phone after I finished explaining to the lady why I didn't have an answer for her yet, cause ya know, calling three times in one morning to find out if the doctor (who, by the way, she has never seen), would write her a letter saying it was "medically necessary to have a pet in her apartment" is at the very top of my priority list. Right behind the guy who wants his Viagra refilled. Right behind the lady who wants a different free sample because Medicaid won't approve what the doctor prescribed. Right behind the guy who wants his Lortab 10 filled from a different doctor who is out of the office. But right now I have to check in someone who is threatening to barf all over the waiting room. Right behind the child who is having an asthma attack. I guess the elderly gentleman standing at my counter who has a med list a mile long will just have to wait a sec before I change them all to generic so Medicare will cover it....., Oi, was that the doctor that just whizzed past me? Maybe I can ask him all these questions right now, while at the same time not mentioning any names so that I won't break any HIPPA regulations? Ooops, too late, Urgent Care is telling me they have a "chest pain" checking in.....well you get the idea - that goes to the very top. A lot of what I deal with is urgent - and I treat it as such. Its a good thing I have a day off so I can deal with my attitude.....Sorry, I'm venting, but I feel better now :-)

Matt and Cache

2008-05-05T21:36:00.004-06:00

My brother recently bought a professionally trained chocolate lab for his fowl huntng habit :-) Looks like they have been out playing.

Because I Miss Them

2008-05-03T19:44:00.003-06:00

Happy May 1st!

2008-05-01T08:11:00.006-06:00

The grass is green, the tulips are blossoming, the birds are singing, the air is warm and sweet with the fresh smell of wait...., SNOW!!!!!!!!! NOT what I was expecting to wake up to on the first day of May. Not only is it currently snowing, but it is also sticking and people are scrapping their car windows. I think I might celebrate the day by playing Christmas music and making fudge :-) Or I can celebrate as the Hawaiians do on May 1st and wear a lai - "Lai Day" -maybe that will usher in spring? Er, well since I can't seem to find any flowers to make a lai, I will have to don my gloves and go shovel the porch and imagine I am back in Hawaii :-/

Life at BMC

2008-04-25T20:10:00.003-06:00

Welcome to another aspect of my life - BMC. I spend the majority of my daylight hours there, (and many of my sleeping hours are spent awake wondering if I remembered to do all that I needed to that day). I have been working there for almost 5 years now! I remember when I first moved to this small town 10 years ago just out of high school and within just a few weeks I had to bring a child that I was babysitting into the clinic to get stitches. Little did I know that I would become a nurse and eventually be working there! Only by that time they had moved from a small building into a huge multifaceted facility at the entrance of town.

I am so thankful for my job. As I was looking through one of my old journals from years ago, I ran across a page were I had written down several things that I wanted in a job. One of them was that I would enjoy going to work everyday. I can honestly say that at this point in my nursing career that I enjoy my job. It may not be what I want to be doing the rest of my life, but I enjoy the people that I work with and appreciate the friendships I have there. I work for and with some of the best doctors in the world. I have been so blessed by their willingness to let me globe trot over the years and they still welcome me back with open arms. Pretty amazing. Of course there are challenges, but my "people skills" are gradually improving and I attribute a good portion of that to day in and day out experience.

BMC has started a blog and I may contribute things to it here and there.

"Captivating"

2008-04-24T21:29:00.004-06:00

Almost every night over the past few weeks, I have been reading a book entitled, "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge. Generally I devour the books I read in long sittings, but I have had to chew on this one and just ingest a chapter or even a half a chapter at a time. Maybe because the issues that are addressed within this book lead me to a vulnerability level that requires a "processing time". I am only a little over half way through, but I hear the Lord speaking directly to specific issues and bringing understanding and encouragement.

This book reveals three core desires that God intentionally placed within women - the desire to be romanced and pursued, the desire to play an irreplaceable role in a shared adventure, and the desire to unveil beauty. Read an excerpt from the introduction:
"The message of Captivating is this: The longings God has written deep in your heart are telling you something essential about what is means to be a woman, and the life He meant for you to live...You can find that life-if you are willing to embark on a great adventure....Not to learn one more set of standards you fail to meet. Not toward a new set of rules to live by and things you ought to do. Something far, far better - a journey of the heart. A journey toward the restoration and release of the woman you always longed to be....(this book) is not about what you ought to do or who you ought to be. It's about discovering who you already are, as a woman. A woman who at her core was made for romance, made to play an irreplaceable role in a shared adventure, and who really does possess a beauty all her own to unveil."

Part of the chapter I read tonight was particularly articulating of the current and seemingly (unending?) season of my life - waiting. This was so encouraging: "As we increasingly become women of substance, women who offer true beauty, we find that our hearts grow in their capacity to love and be loved, to desire, to live. Our hearts are enlarged by Jesus. By that, we mean that we must be willing to be honest with Him and with ourselves about the true nature of our souls - our sorrows, our desires, our dreams, our fears, our deepest and scariest hopes. To invite Jesus to come and walk with us there....We do not always get what we want, but that doesn't mean that we no longer want...Living in true beauty can require much waiting, much time, much tenacity in spirit. We must constantly direct our gazes toward the face of God, even in the presence of longing and sorrow. It is in the waiting (with Him) that our hearts are enlarged. The waiting doesn't diminish us. As a pregnant woman is enlarged in her waiting, so are our hearts. God does not always rescue us out of a painful season. He does not always give to us what we so desperately want when we want it. He is after something much more valuable than our happiness. Much more substantive than our health. He is restoring and growing in us an eternal weight of glory."

Spoiled for the Ordinary

2008-04-20T22:04:00.006-06:00

It is easy to be on an emotional high and graphically describe life when you are in a foreign country for a short period of time. Suddenly life takes on a new fascination, a deeper hue of color is seen from standing at a different angle. Even the dirt and bugs and cold showers come alive with purpose and manifestations of glory. You feel completely awed with the opportunity to experience life. However, once you are home, and the bags are unpacked, and the pictures have been oohhed and ahhed over, and the mundane of the familiar once again glares straight back into your face -the heart tends to make a nosedive unless you have made a proactive decision. I want to live for eternity one day at a time - embracing each moment as a gift from the Lord no matter how mundane and "unspiritual" it may seem. Knowing that if anything matters, everything matters. Living each day before the Lord, to His glory and satisfaction - whether I am holding HIV babies at an orphanage in Africa, or wheeling a patient out to their car, or scrubbing the church toilet for the zillionth time, or even sitting alone on my back porch believing the Lord for the desires He has put in my heart. I want my life to be poured out as worship to Him. I want the eyes to see in faith. I want to live with a fascinated heart, one that embraces life and is spoiled for the ordinary. I recently read a quote that seems to fit here: "When we look with eyes of faith, all the ground we walk on becomes holy ground, all the people and all the common sights and sounds and happenings become miracles." Herbert F. Brokering

And when I fail, and fall headlong into the nosedive - I want to run straight back into His loving arms.

"How He Loves Us"

2008-04-14T18:43:00.005-06:00

Spring Cleaning

2008-04-13T21:54:00.003-06:00

Ahhh, it's finally sorta warm. Might snow tomorrow, cause it is Idaho, but today has been a lovely 72 degrees. The slight tan I got in Uganda has suffered greatly this last week and probably won't have a chance to recover due to the forcasted amount of hours scheduled indoors at work. O well, as one friend pointed out, at least I HAD been in the tropics while she was still shoveling snow.....
Anyways, I love spring cleaning. I look forward to it all winter - opening the windows and doors so the fresh air can permeate every corner of the apartment, moving the furniture to vacuum up all the hibernating dust bunnies, even rearranging the closet so the short sleeve shirts are within closer reach (the long johns are still at the forefront cause ya never know til at least July.) I didn't get every thing done, but I did feel satisfied with the day.
However, I hesitated to completely unpack my suitcase from the trip. Yes, I have been home for over a week, but I haven't completely adjusted to being back. I didn't want my time in Uganda to be written in disappearing ink. I wanted the reality of the people and that place to stick with me. Maybe keeping the bag partially packed was a tie to that reality. Nevertheless, the clothes are washed now and I received an email from Grace. (Hehe, I guess washing the dirt out didn't erase as much as I had subconsciously thought it might.) The reality is to stay in the love of God and continue in fellowship. Perfect love casts out fear, so there is no room to be afraid of "losing" what the Lord gave me in Uganda. "For I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day." 2 Tim 1:12

Jet Laggin

2008-04-06T17:13:00.003-06:00

Being wide awake at 3am has its advantages. Its a great time to scrub the tub and mop the floor, but it doesn't allow for much motivation the rest of the day. I'm jetting lagging bad. Maybe I can keep my eyes open til 9....

Back Home

2008-04-04T09:40:00.004-06:00

Hot showers are amazing! I had considered collecting all the red dust I was covered in and potting a pineapple or an avacodo tree, but somehow I don't think it would do well in this FREEZING cold. I was still covered in Uganda last night went I arrived home around midnight after 48 hours of traveling. I had a long layover in Amsterdam so I took the opportunity to take a tour through town. Holland is beautiful and the tulips and daffodils are just starting to bloom. It was kind of an overcast and rainy day in Amsterdam, but it was great to get out and walk and see the flowers, windmills, and lush green Dutch farmlands.

It is good to be home. I had to think twice before I brushed my teeth with fresh water flowing from the tap. I take so many little things for granted...

Werabe

2008-04-02T03:02:00.004-06:00

Good byes are always hard, even when you know it is only a temporary goodbye. I leave Uganda in a just a few short hours - boy, time has flown by. I am so thankful for the opportunity to come and not only have an experience, but to build and grow in relationships that will last far beyond the last crayon being used, beyond the new shoes wearing out, even beyond the new school being built that will influence generations to come. Life and the people that make up that life are such a gift. People are messy, maintaining and cultivating a relationship is work, but the reward far outweighs the cost. I have learned so much by just observing Paul and Pam. They are skilled at working through misunderstandings, miscommunication, and deception at core levels. They genuinely love people, and they are amazing to watch as they engage the Ugandans through the love and truth of Jesus Christ.

Day before yesterday, on a second trip to Bukeeka, Paul, Pam, Robert, and I were walking up the road and up ahead of us was an old Jaja (grandmother) walking toward us balancing a large pole on her head. She was still a distance off, but she must have seen me pull out my camera to capture a great shot of African culture (and balance). She immediately put one hand on the pole and came at us waving her finger at me and shouting something I couldn’t understand. This was the first time I had ever had someone not want me to take a picture,(well, except for The Bridge, but that is a different story), and I immediately lowered my camera out of respect. I assumed that she did not want her photo taken because she presumably a Muslim. However, Robert interpreted and said that she was demanding money for her photo to be taken. Paul handed her a couple hundred shillings but she remained irate, continuing to scowl and wave her finger. My first inclination was to walk off and let her remain in her own little greedy, grouchy world. But Paul, recognizing that something deeper was going on, gave her a couple more coins, but she was not appeased. Pam encouraged her to be thankful for receiving the money but Jaja stood with a pout. Muttering, she stood still for half a moment as I snapped a shot but she was obviously not pleased. She continued to squawk in her native tongue and at that point Robert realized what she had no understanding of coins. In her mind, coins had never been associated with payment. Robert said that she was asking for money, and money to her was paper. Paul pulled out a paper 1000 shilling and she said “ah hah!” and smiled and instantly posed with a huge grin for her photo along side Paul. All along she thought we were holding out on her, while in fact, it was her own paradigm and that was keeping her from her blessing. By pushing through in this interaction, we had been blessed to finally understand what she was thinking and she had been blessed with a little “pocket change.”

I am sharing this because I realized that I, being a typical American, quite often don’t think I have the time to spend working through issues with difficult people who are not on the same communication wave as I am. But through this small example, I saw my own impatience and lack of skill, mirrored by Paul and Pam’s willingness to pursue root issues and help people come out of bondage. I witnessed such examples over and over. I am so thankful that the Lord revealed and exposed my heart, for I know that my attitude and perceptions have been changed. I am praying that the Lord will teach me to be skilled in my encounters with people. I have plenty of opportunities to practice everyday.

Thank you, Paul and Pam, and Abdu and Betty for welcoming me into your home and for sharing the past three weeks of your life with me and for your friendship. Thank you Uganda for welcoming me wherever I went and for your beautiful smiles - they are forever etched on my heart and I will see you again. Thank you everyone at home for releasing me and even sending me to Africa, and for your prayers while I am here. My life has been blessed and is richer because of all of you.

Uganda Heath Care

2008-04-01T12:34:00.004-06:00

Being a nurse, I am very interested in observing health care in other nations - especially third world countries. Since we have done most of the visiting and distributing supplies among the villages, I have been able to visually assess the obvious sickness and disease rampant in especially the children, and yet much of it can be prevented by educating and implementing basic personal hygiene and proper nutrition. I also had the opportunity to today to visit the local hospital and a few of the outpatient clinics in town. I am so used to HIPPA regulations in the US that I intentionally left my camera at home and unfortunately didn’t capture any visual explanation of what I experienced. (There is no such thing as HIPPA here, btw. I could have taken pictures.)

Paul explained to me as we entered the hospital grounds that each building (known as a ward) houses specific disease states. For example, there is a TB unit, HIV / Aids Units, Labor and Delivery, Pediatric, Theater (Surgery), etc. They are long rectangular cinder block buildings. I didn’t count, but I would guesstamate around 10-15 of them. Most had multiple rooms that contained 6-8 beds. I learned that the patient had to provide their own bedding, often their own mattress, their own meals, and their own nursing care. There are nurses around that may administer medications and there is a doctor that makes rounds, but there is no dietician, social services, etc. During my visit, the sidewalks and grounds surrounding the buildings had many people sitting around, sleeping, eating, preparing meals, and doing laundry. These are the patients’ family members who come to live at the hospital to care for their loved ones.

The nursing staff at the hospital greeted and welcomed us and inviting us to tour the grounds unaccompanied. They were a breath of fresh air in an otherwise less than hygienic environment. I believe they genuinely care for people and have the desire to improve the care and quality of their facility.

We walked through the L & D ward where I was struck by the vast difference to what I am accustomed to in the US. There were two large rooms filled with pregnant women whose sagging bellies were only matched by the sagging mattresses. Most were laying in the beds, some with IV’s, some with newborns, most with family members sitting at the end of the bed, on the floors, or even napping in the bed with the patient. The water in the basins was dirty, the IV’s lacked IV poles, dirty dishes were laying around. I don’t really know what protocol is in place, I just know I am far away from home and I wouldn’t want to have a baby here, or get stitches, or even receive an injection.

We visited an outpatient clinic where they test and treat malaria - which is the biggest killer in Uganda, along with HIV. This clinic was clean and seemed to have a decent lab, but I was again astounded when I watched the lab techs draw and test blood without wearing gloves. I have the understanding that they wear gloves when gloves available - but that is not the norm. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around the fact that Uganda is such a high risk area - HIV, Ebola, Hepatitis, malaria, etc, and yet they don’t even have access to some of the most simple things proven to help stop the spread of disease. My purpose in sharing my experience is not to expose anyone, just to bring to reality what people are dealing with in third world countries.

More Photos - As Promised!

2008-04-01T08:35:00.004-06:00

Journal Excerpt

2008-03-31T12:44:00.005-06:00

I was rereading today in the book I read during my flight to Africa. I was struck again by this statement:

“Paradigms power perception and perceptions power emotions. Most emotions are responses to perception - what you think is true about a given situation. If your perception is false, then your emotional response to it will be false too. So check your perceptions, and beyond that check the truthfulness of your paradigms - what you believe. Just because you believe firmly doesn’t make it true. Be willing to reexamine what you believe. The more you live in the Truth, the more your emotions will help you see clearly…” Excerpt from The Shack

So many times I find my emotions dictating my actions and reactions - good or bad. I take my eyes off the Truth and settle for my own interpretation of circumstances and situations based on my own perception, which may or may not line up with the Truth. This applies to my time here in Africa, to my work and career, to the way I interact with people, and even how I view myself.

Father, I thank you for this reminder so kindly given to me today. I repent of living too often out of my own misaligned emotions rather than responding in agreement to Your truth. I invite You to continue dealing with and adjusting my perceptions and the motives of my heart. I ask for Your ability and grace to respond rather than react, and eyes to see and embrace Truth and walk it out in my own life.

Jinja Christian Center and Group Photo

2008-03-30T07:58:00.005-06:00

Source of the Nile and Bujigali Falls Pics

2008-03-29T13:17:00.007-06:00

Baptisms

2008-03-29T12:45:00.003-06:00

This morning we visited the Source of the Nile for baptisms. The Nile River is one of two rivers in the world that flow north and it originates from a spring in Lake Victoria. Syd, Jade, and Savannah were all baptized. This trip to Africa has really impacted their life and God has touched them in a deep way. Jade is 14 and Savannah is 15, and it has been such a joy to get to know them better and to encourage them in their growing walk with the Lord. It was a significant day for them and I am thankful that I was a witness. Paul wrote an update and gave me permission to post it here also.

Paul wrote:

Have you noticed that important steps tend to be public things? Not all important transitions, for many are unseen events of the heart, but milestones like dedications, graduations, weddings, ribbon cuttings, retirements, etc.
Early this morning, 8 of us made our way to the Source of the River Nile. This is a government park that commemorates the discovery of the source of the Nile River out of Lake Victoria. Six of us paid 5,000 shillings while the Ugandans paid 1,000 shillings. White people have to struggle for economic equality here. But, that’s another story!
We were there at the Source while tourist posed for photos, orphans played drums and danced, vendors tempted people with African made crafts, and river guides pleaded for passengers to board their water craft and travel up river to the “actual” source of the Nile. We were there in the midst of all this public activity at the request of Savannah, Jayde (pronounced jade), and her mother Syd (short for Sydney). All three wanted to be baptized and the Source is where people in Jinja go for public baptism.
Richard, one of the pastors of Jinja Christian Center, was a part of our group along with Abdu, who has become very dear to all three of these ladies. Pam, Jenny, and I were along to witness, encourage, and take photos of this spiritual historic and significant event.
The ladies sat on a ledge facing the Nile and Richard gave a thoroughly biblical teaching on baptism. Each of us, not just the baptism candidates, but each of us was given something from the Lord as Richard blessed with God’s Word.
The three ladies shared why they wanted to be baptized. Syd had been baptized immediately after becoming born again 15 years ago, but it was more a religious ritual than a real exchange. She is now aware that baptism is a fervent symbol of leaving everything behind, and completely following Christ as the source of life. Her daughter, Jayde, was baptized as an infant and had no idea what was happening to her. This was a personal commitment for her. Through a waterfall of tears, Savannah poured out her heart to all of us and the Lord. She wants to be completely and passionately committed to Christ.
Each testimony was moving. God’s presence was felt by all of us in the peace of all the commercial activity. We were experiencing a spiritual reality of intimacy between these ladies and the Lord.
Richard, with help from Abdu, moved to the water and quietly and reverently committed each person into the water, signifying that they were leaving everything behind and moving forward for the glory of God. Tears were shed, hearts were moved, hugs were given and received, praise was offered, and towels were handed out by Pam to soak up the water from the Nile River.
Thank you, Lord Jesus, for setting the pattern for us! Thank you for doing the will of your Father. May each of these precious souls who discovered You in a different way here in Africa, do what they were designed to do in the power of Your Holy Spirit.

Ants for Dinner....NOT!!!

2008-03-27T11:48:00.008-06:00

The other day in the market we came across a seasonal item - fried ants. Syd and I talked about trying one - ONLY ONE - and Grace obliged us (Thankyou Grace). She brought home a whole bag this afternoon and fried them up. Yikes, they didn't look too bad at the market - small enough to pop one in the mouth, receive a star for my "Things I Have Eaten in Other Countries and Wish I Hadn't" badge, and then be done with it. However, they plumped right up in the skillet, grew legs, and filled the kitchen, uh, no, actually the whole house with a funky dead fried ant smell. Grace ate two in the kitchen, Syd ate a mouthful, Alfred ate a bowlful, and Terrese ate two or three handfuls, and I ate - NONE! Pam walked in and we told her that Grace brought ants home - Pam wasn't very happy and asked that they not be placed on the dinner table. Thank you Pam! However, when I was doing dishes tonight I ran across a bowlful of........I screamed, asked what was in the bowl (knowing full well what they were) and promtly washed them down the sink. Someone didn't eat their ANT LEGS!!!!

Slimed

2008-03-26T13:24:00.003-06:00

Naminya

2008-03-26T12:40:00.006-06:00

Paul and Pam took us to visit the widows of Naminya today. I had heard much about “the best banana bread in the world” and I was excited to sink my own teeth into it and to experience the whole baking experience for myself. The village of Naminya is about halfway between Jinja and Bukeeka, but this time we each had our own personal motorcycle boda boda. With seven of us, it felt like we were the “Hell’s Angels” zipping down the narrow highway.

We come to Regina’s home (one of the 9 “widows of Naminya”) and met up with the other widows who had already arrived to start their day of baking. These fine ladies, personal friends of the Hunter’s, started a thriving bread baking business about a year ago. Regina and Florence were already cutting up pumpkins to roast under banana leaves. Sissy was stoking the fire in the mud oven that had been specially designed for them. Margaret had been sent to find bananas. All were busy about their jobs but stopped to greet us with a warm hug and “Kali, kali”. Mama Sarah, a tall and regal woman, pulled up benches for us to settle in to as she invited us to watch the process.

As the pumpkin roasted, Pam pulled out reading glasses that Syd had brought in her bags of goodies. Pam had noticed several weeks ago that one of the widows had a difficult time reading and had let her try her own reading glasses. The widow’s face lit up as she was actually able to read the words on the page, so that inspired Pam to obtain reading glasses for all of them. One by one, the widows tried on different sets of glasses to see what worked the best. Mama Sarah picked up her own Bible and tried out her new glasses. She had a big grin on her face and said, “This is good, this is good! I can read my Bible!”

By this time, the pumpkin was being stripped from the peel and mashed up in a big bowl. Florence was sifting flour and another was measuring out sugar. It was such a joy to watch them giggle and tease each other as they cooked. The dough was poured into the pans, set in the oven, and sealed for the allotted cooking time. We had been observing and keeping entertained through the whole process. It was great to have both Paul and Pam with us, just hanging out and enjoying each other’s company.

As the hours passed, various children passed by on the road near us. Because this village has not had as much exposure to whites, their reactions to us were more of fright and timidity than what I had seen in town and Bukeeka. At one point, a group of kids came galloping by at full speed past the house and glanced just long enough to catch us in their vision. The breaks went on and I heard one shout, “Mzungu!” like we were some type of rare specimen that had just been rediscovered. For a split second, they stared at us, and then just as fast has they had stopped, they resumed speed and tore down the road. Shortly after, I decided to walk up to the road and just see what there was to see. I looked down one way. Nothing but a red dirt road. Looked the other way. A small boy tagging a ways behind his father turned in just enough time to see me and instantly started screaming and ran as fast as he could the down the road to catch up with his father. Not the reaction I had expected. All the other Mzungus were laughing at me when I reached the house again. “What in the world did you do to that poor child!??” “Nothing!” I said.

About the time the oven started emitting the most wonderfully delicious smell, a large group of uniformed school children stopped by to investigate where the smell was coming from. A bit hesitant, due to my just prior experience of scaring a poor child to death simply by looking at him, I walked up to the group to introduce myself and make friends. Again, my camera came in handy and all walls seemed to immediately tumble as they shrieked and giggled at their images on the screen. Syd came to the rescue as I was getting mauled by eager hands. Syd is so great with the kids. She sat them all down within seconds had them talking and asking questions, and even singing songs. The blistering noon sun beat down on us but the kids would have sat there for hours had we had enough stamina. Syd and I had to get back to the shade before we burnt to a crisp so we bid the children goodbye - besides, the bread was done and begging for attention :-)

Margaret served us cold sodas, which she had just brought from town balanced in a tub on her head. We all gathered in the shade, Pam skillfully removed the tops off the glass bottles using a wooden bench and a quick whack of her hand. One of the widows brought two huge plates of thickly sliced bread and we all sank our teeth into truly the best banana bread you have ever tasted. The fellowship was sweet and we again marveled at the Lord’s goodness.

After that, a few of us went further up the road to Mama Sarah’s house to visit the milk cows, calves, and hang out while Abdu collected milk. I loved hanging out there, far away from town, cell phones, traffic noise, pollution, and most everything else that brings stress and anxiety. The lush rolling tropical hills of Uganda seemed to stretch on forever from that place of solitude. Pale green butterflies danced in the wind and the scent of earthy goodness wafted along on the light breeze. The tethered calves beckoned me closer with their huge puppy dog eyes and the smallest one nuzzled my pants looking for milk. He decided my fingers would suffice as a pacifier until his dinner came. Completely covered in slime to my elbows, I sought out Abdu and he graciously offered water to rinse at least the first layer off my hands. But you know I loved every minute of it.

Bukeeka

2008-03-25T13:42:00.004-06:00

Wow, what an incredible day. I am not sure how to put words to what I experienced today, although my pictures may open a small window to the world I saw. We went to Bukeeka, which was about a 20 minute bus ride from Jinja. Loaded once again with army green duffels, six Mzungu women tottered on the back of boda bodas to the bus station. I think we must be quite a sight and stick out like sore thumbs, although the whole visual experience is entertaining for the onlookers, I am sure.
We arrived in the village of Bukeeka, which from the road looks not unlike any other village we passed along the way. Children in ragged T-shirts playing in two and threes under blooming plumeria trees, tethered goats contentedly chewing their cud, barefoot mammas stirring huge pots of porridge while groups of men whittle away at sticks and talk story. As we departed from the bus, the children aroused from their watch posts and ran up to us, singing in unison, “Hello Mzungu how are you? Mzungu, mzungo! How are you?” We greeted them back, saying “I am fine, how are you?”
Pam said that we had a short walk up the hill to the school. Robert (one of the men that had been denied a visa a week ago) and his wife, Sarah, felt a strong leading from the Lord to pursue building the Kingdom of God in this predominately Islamic village named Bukeeka back in 2004. He gave them vision and provision and they began Fountain of Hope School, which we were visiting today.
Being Americans, we talked rather loudly as we strolled up the hill. Even before we could see our destination, we could hear the school children’s voices ringing out in expectation of our coming. Our voices had given us away even before they could see us. The gate was already lined with children that had escaped the classrooom to greet us. “Hello mzungu, hello mzungo!!!” It was a delightful welcoming party, their bright smiles and passionate waving would warm even the hardest heart. I was surprised though, that walking through the gate they were not rude or pushy in their effort to be near to us, granted there were only a few of them and their teachers were standing near by. We had obviously interrupted class time, but Sarah graciously greeted us and took us to a back room to unload our goodies. She explained that Fountain of Hope is currently divided into two different locations in Bukeeka. The younger ages were being taught at this lower location that they are renting and the teenagers were up the road at the new facility that is under construction and would eventually house the entire school.
This lower “campus” was basically a brick barn with stalls as classrooms. Sarah took us to each class and we introduced ourselves and shared briefly with each class. Then we passed out small gifts (bracelets, sweets, stickers) to each student. They were able to contain their bridled excitement until the camera was pulled out. They love the camera!!!! We would snap their picture and display the digital result. They giggled and shrieked in delight and would reposture themselves in an effort to be in yet another frame in front of my camera. Me, still being a newcomer to Africa, think that all Africans look alike (at least until you get to know them), and probably got multiple pictures of the exact same children. At least we had fun…….
When we finished at the lower school, we trekked over half a mile up the hill to the new school which is still under construction. The journey of getting there was half the fun. So many beautiful sights, and it was an absolute adventure for all of us. We greeted people along the way and marveled at the rich colors and lush hues of creation manifesting all around us. The sweltering heat didn’t even dampen our spirits.
Again, the children heard us coming before we had actually arrived. They were on a break and were free to run down and meet us. This older group was a bit more reserved in their verbal greeting, although their eyes watched our every move and nothing escaped their close observation. Rows of brilliant white teeth glowed against ebony skin as we reached out our hands to touch theirs. All facades of reservation washed away as we pulled out cameras and snapped photos for their inspection.
We were introduced to Joseph, the headmaster of the school and he gave us a tour of the expanding grounds. There are two finished buildings of classrooms - composed of crisp yellow wooden planks and gleaming stainless steel hinges and tin roofs. There is another building still under construction.
Once break was over the children had been corralled back within the classrooms, we were officially introduced to each class and learned more about the educational system in Uganda. I was astounded to learn that the last two years of “high school” started at 5am and ended at 10pm, 6 days a week! This is all in preparation for them to sit for their final exam which determines if they graduate.
Fountain of Hope School started with 67 students but has grown to 400 in only 3 years. It has been a great blessing to the Bukeeka village. In addition to having an amazing school, Fountain of Hope is in the process of digging a well that will supply water to the upper portion of Bukeeka. Right now, all the water has to be hauled over ½ a mile from the main village by the road. They also want to place a milk cow and laying chickens at the school and even stock a small store as a resource both to the village and to teach the children practical agriculture, farming, and business skills.
Walking back down to the main village, my heart was filled with a type of satisfaction I have seldom experienced. I had not “done” anything or performed some great task, but I had given part of my heart to these children and may never get it back...

Winter is Here

2008-03-23T09:19:00.003-06:00

“Winter “ is officially here. We had a major thunder and lightning storm with rain last night that knocked out the power. I loved lying there in bed listening to the heavy rain but I wondered how it was affecting the villages and mud huts. The rain let up long enough to walk to church this morning but started up again shortly after the service started. The congregation of 800 meets outside under a semi built shelter. Tall poles hold up a tin roof and the sides are open so we had full view of the torrent of rain belting us from the side. Rivers of water rushed in under our feet and we had to tie the ends of our dresses up to keep from getting wet. The goats grazing just a few yards from the building looked longingly at our shelter but refused to join us, opting instead to cuddle up next to the brick fence. It also got really cold (for Africa anyway) but I was lucky and had one of the young girls fall asleep on my lap for the entire service so we both kept pretty warm. We left at 2pm and it was still raining hard. The streets had turned into flowing red rivers and there was a power line down that blocked our way home. A few detours later we made it to the house soaking wet but thankful that we didn’t live in a mud hut. I stepped outside after lunch and promptly introduced my rear to the hard cement - wet red clay makes a surface slicker than snot, lol. It is 6pm right now and still raining….I don’t think we will be going anywhere tonight.

Pictures

2008-03-23T08:37:00.004-06:00

I seem to have a decent internet connection right now so I am taking advantage and uploading a few pictures :-)

Amani Baby Cottage

2008-03-21T13:15:00.008-06:00

Addendum: This journal entry was simply my interpretation of what I experienced that day. I may have gotten some of the facts wrong.

Today we went to Amani Baby Cottage to drop off formula and blankets. It was another amazing day. We headed out at 10am and this time we took a taxi to hall all the stuff. Boda bodas are fairly convenient but not if you are carrying a load.
I love Amani Baby Cottage! As we pulled up to the gate I was instantly impressed with the excellence in which the grounds are maintained. The large yellow compound stood like a rock against the lush green grass and trees surrounding it. A huge tree in the front yard hosted a tree house and a tire swing. There were several groups of young children playing on the lawn closely supervised by “mamas”.
We were greeted by the supervisor of the facility. She thanked us for coming and was overjoyed when we pulled out the formula and other supplies. She exclaimed that they never run out, it just seems that the Lord provides just as they are getting low on things. As she walked us up the small hill to the clinic where they treat the sick babies, she explained to us that they currently have 43 children, all ages up to 5 years old. Amini Baby Cottage has been in operation for 5 years and adopted out their first 10 children just a few months ago. Since that time, all of the children have been spoken for, although it takes a process of over 2 ½ years to actually take the baby home. Several of these children are HIV positive or have other health issues that require close supervision.
She then showed us around the facility and the different baby quarters. They currently have around 14 volunteers from all over the world that work full time. They also have a full staff of “human washing machines”. At least a quarter of the back yard had clothes lines fully laden with drying baby clothes and diapers, with at least 4 women washing and rinsing. The outdoor kitchen has 3 cooks that prepare 3 meals a day for the children.
Almost all of the children they currently have came from the hospital where they had been dropped off. I learned that in Uganda if a mother is caught abandoning her child anywhere but the hospital, they are convicted and placed in jail for a period of time. However, if they abandon their baby to the hospital, there is no prosecution and the government deals with placing the baby in a home. Amani has a few real “orphans” but most of them have simply been abandoned by their mothers.
At the end of the tour, we each went to help out in different areas of the cottage for a few hours. I choose to go in with the newborns - is there any other place to be if given the option? They currently have three - Mabra Mabra They are both HIV positive and their mother died at birth. Their father brought them to the home because he was unable to care for them. During feeding time, a volunteer from Uganda, came and sat with me. I asked her how long she had been volunteering at the home. She said she had been there for 5 months and is 7 months pregnant. She came to volunteer because she is only 17 and her parents had disowned her when they learned she was pregnant. A friend brought her to the cottage hoping that she would learn how to care for her baby.
After feeding time all the children took a nap and we had the opportunity to meet the director of the cottage, She has an incredible story of how the home was founded. Long story shorter, she said she had been a “professional bum” for ten years. She had graduated and started volunteering for short and long term mission trips around the world and managed to end up in Uganda when she was around 30. At that time she was working with an orphanage in Jinja (the same compound I am staying at right now, when it was an orphanage). She spent two years here and then decided to adopt two Ugandan girls. She was single at the time, and her dad sat her down one day and told her that if she adopted these girls she would greatly decrease her chance of ever getting married. She laughed and reminded her dad that here she was at 32 and had never had anyone remotely interested in marrying her up to that point, so why not increase the odds all the more?
Shortly after, the founder and director of the home she was working in died suddenly and through a series of events, suddenly found herself director of a new orphanage, Amani Baby Cottage. The first day they were official with the government, they were given 12 children and have grown every day since.

My Life in Uganda

2008-03-21T00:58:00.008-06:00

I have a little time this morning to share some of what my life is like right now in Uganda. The African culture is so much more laid back and relaxed than American life. They are the hardest workers that I have seen, but they are not in a hurry or stressed about getting things done by a certain time. This is both a challenge and a blessing. They take time to relate. The expectation is to greet everyone and spend several minutes in conversation, which will often result in delayed schedules, etc. The Africans are very friendly and expressive. Walking down the road we are always being greeted with waves and, "Hello Muzungu!"

Paul took us girls Easter dress shopping today so that we would not be cheated on the price. He was great to have around and it was very entertaining to watch him. Downtown Jinja has many open air type shops ranging from shoes, clothes, food, housewares, crafts, materials, etc. There are many shops that have the same thing and you just have to find the best deal. Uganda deals in shillings and depending on the exchange rate 1,000 shillings is about .60 U.S. cents. A boda boda ride one way to town is 500 shillings - about .30 cents.

Abdu and Betty have a one year old baby who is the cutest thing I have ever seen. I am amazed how active he is, he is walking and climbing stairs and even climbed up on the coffee table and stood up on it and beat his chest like Tarzan, (hehe, just kidding about the Tarzan part). I have never seen a one year old with such balance! Maybe its an African thing?

I cook breakfast every morning for everyone. They are loving it and enjoy having food they normally don't get - crepes, french toast, quiche, hash browns. Hmmm, what should I make tomorrow? I am running out of ideas. Grace, their hired cook, is gone for the weekend so I get to help Pam with dinner for the next 2 days. Grace and I have become good friends and she has been such a joy to get to know. We are a lot a like in many ways, although she is much more outgoing and comical than I am. She is 32, has never been married but is praying for a husband. She is such a servant and is always looking for ways to bless people.

We have fresh pineapple every night after dinner. I love the food because they eat very little sugar and there are no preservatives in the food and everything is fresh. O yeah, the Hunters have a huge avocado tree in their backyard which is full of humongous avocados! I love it! My favorite food in the world right in my backyard!!!

The dirt is very red and there is always red dust that has to be continually wiped off tables, beds, computers, and clothes. It was kind of funny today - Syd was wiping off walls this morning and Sarah (7) asked, "What are you doing?" Syd replied, "I am washing the wall." Sarah, with a quizzical look on her face, asked "But why?"

Mbiiko Village

2008-03-20T11:00:00.004-06:00

Syd and her girls brought over 300 pounds of donated supplies for the schools and orphanages. We spent most of the evening yesterday unpacking the stuffed green duffel bags loaded with crayons, shoes, t-shirts, story books, flashlights, baby formula and blankets, etc. This morning we joined Betty and went with her to Nbiiko where she teaches every day. She started this school for primary age children (3-6 yrs) almost a year ago and currently has 12 students in the heart of one of the poorest area’s in the village.
The morning started with us having to rearrange the supplies we were bringing because we realized that we had to ride boda bodas in skirts with a huge awkward duffel bag! That was not going to work well, especially since it was the first time for us to sit side saddle style on a moving bike. That was a challenge in itself! We arrived at the taxi station without any mishaps, then we crowded into the taxi. It was overly full but didn’t have any chickens or goats accompanying us - which can be a usual occurrence.
We arrived at our destination and walked a short distance into the middle of the village. We were greeted getting off the bus by a mob of older looking children who were hams for the camera. (Most people here love having their pictures taken. The children become alive when the camera comes out.) We walked past cow pastures and goats eating the yard. Muddy puddles of water blocked our path and we had to make a few slight detours. Walking up a small hill, we came upon a cinderblock building that already had 5 children waiting there for us. It was amazing to see the looks on their faces as they gazed up at these four new Muzungo (white) girls. I can only imagine what they must have been thinking - it is certainly not every day that a white person comes to their town.
Syd immediately sat on the floor and started playing blocks with them. After just a few minutes they warmed up to us and we had a great time interacting with them for the next 3 hours. Their eyes lit up when we pulled out play dough and showed them how to mold it into shapes (after explaining that no, you can’t eat it!). They giggled in delight as the miniature flashlights were handed out. The suckers brought out wide eyes of wonder, followed by stained red, blue, and green tongues tasting something they had never imagined. And to wrap it up, we passed out toothbrushes and paste and showed them how to brush their teeth.
When the school children were released to go home, we took a load of baby blankets and walked around the village to pass out blankets to mothers. As we walked up and down the dirt pathways connecting the huts made out of clay and sticks, the extreme poverty of this area hit me. There had been a child during class earlier in the day that had shoes that didn't fit and it broke our hearts. His little feet were crammed into a shoe not nearly large enough. Also, two of the children came without a lunch because their parents didn't have enough food to send even a piece of bread. However, these children were so full of life and joy. The simplest things made them happy.
There were many kids in the village that couldn't afford to come to school. They followed along and and posed like professional models against dark red clay huts and rusted barbed wire, their dark intense eyes poring a hole right through your veneer. Their curiosity often got the better of them and they would run up and take our hand. Tears came to my eyes - not because of the poverty and lack, but because of the value and beauty of these people, and to have the opporunity to engage them in real life and not just from the comfort of my living room, reading "National Geographic". There is no way that I will ever be the same.

Well, I had several pictures to post tonight but the connection is too slow. I will get them on later :-)

Update

2008-03-19T05:27:00.010-06:00

Yesterday started early as we left Jinja at 5am to leave for Kampala. Paul and Pam were taking Abdu and Robert to the American Embassy to appeal for a visa so they could come to US for 2 months this summer and receive some training. We also were taking Chad and Quaid (the video guys) back to Entebbe for their outgoing flight and to pick up his wife, Syd, daughter, Jade and her friend, Savana.

Getting to downtown Kampala that early in the morning was quite an adventure! Bumper to bumper traffic with pedestrians, motorbikes, and bikes weaving in and out. At one point there was a young man on a skateboard holding onto the back of some random truck maneuvering through traffic. We arrived to the embassy at 7:30am and had to wait until 8 for them to open the gates. After going through security, I was standing on American soil once again. Then we went through the process of Abdu and Robert waiting for their interview for the visa. Paul brings one or two Ugandan men who have demonstrated leadership and character qualities with him back to the states during the summer months to receive more training and equipping in their sphere of influence. They return to Uganda to implement into their own business and community what they have learned .

For example, Abdu, (he and his wife Betty and two children - Moses and Sarah live with the Hunters) wants to raise chickens. Not just a few chickens to supply his family with eggs, but millions of chickens which will lay millions of eggs. He wants to build a business and teach and equip other Ugandan’s to do the same. He told me yesterday that he believes in the concept that if you give a man a fish he will come back later asking for another. But if you teach him how to fish, he will prosper and come out of his “begging” mentality - which is big here in Uganda and the rest of Africa. Abdu currently has over 100 laying chickens but is working to expand his farm and build bigger chicken barns and eventually have a fully automated chicken barn. One purpose of him coming to the US is to visit our chicken farms and receive vision and practical knowledge on how to implement this in his community.

This was Abdu’s 5th time applying for a visa. We believed and prayed that the visas would be granted. However, both the men’s visa’s were denied. It was a tough and disappointing morning for us, but we are trusting the Lord for His timing and purposes.

The remainder of the morning we spent in Kampala grocery shopping. Paul, Pam, and Robert left and went home, while the rest of us went to the airport to drop off and pick up. It was a long afternoon of waiting. We dropped them at 2:30 and picked up the girls at 9:30. I became very familiar with the Entebbe airport, drank Fanta (a soda), watched planes from Ethiopia land and fly away, watched monkeys, napped, looked at Lake Victoria from a distance, watched people, and visited with Abdu and our driver - all in all fully imerging myself in the Ugandan national past time. After picking the girls, we once again made the trek back to Jinja. It was pretty entertaining watching our latest arrivals’ faces as we once again had a few close calls with oncoming sugar cane trucks fully equip with one working headlight and audacious black men walking across the dark road with nothing to warn of their crossing except their bright smiles.

Ok, Paul just sent me his update. I am going to post it here because it explains a lot that I didn't.

In the words of Paul Hunter:

The Joy of Victory … and the Agony of Defeat March 19, 2008
My father really enjoyed sports when I was a boy growing up. After we got a television we were introduced to Major League Baseball, the National Basketball Association, the National Football League, Summer and Winter Olympics, and, on every Saturday afternoon … ABC’s Wide World of Sports. Their introduction, accompanied by a wide range of sports video, is burned forever in my memory, “… the joy of victory … and the agony of defeat.”This phrase leaped to my mind as I began to attempt a recap of our past three days here in Uganda.Sunday Next Generation Ministries hosted and cosponsored a marriage conference with our home church here. It was a one day conference titled The Joy of Marriage. We had 15 couples, three of whom are engaged and yet to be married, who attended and it turned out to be a GREAT day of GREAT joy for all of us. I enjoyed the testimonies at the end of the day as much as I enjoyed all the rest of the activity. Malcolm, one of our team members, Pam and I did the teaching. Malcolm’s wife, Lilly, helped him lead worship and sang her last recorded song ... twice. God advanced His Kingdom in the lives of those who attended, including Pam and me. We fell into bed at the end of the day with a renewed vision for the marriages and families of Uganda and a refreshed spirit for our own.Monday was another big day for us and a wonderful lady named Alice. Alice is Betty’s mother and one of the widows who works with the other widows in the Ebenezer Bakery. Her sponsor had graciously provided the funds to purchase 182 chicks, and feed and doctor them for the next 5 months until they begin producing eggs. Alice will then have another dependable source of income for food and school fees for her children. When we arrived with the chicks, plus 10 roosters chicks that the seller threw in, Alice was so happy she giggled like a young school girl! When she expressed her appreciation for this gracious provision from God, for the video camera, I began to leak. God is SO good.The joy of victory … what a pleasant taste that was!
Very early Tuesday morning we gathered in a circle in the dark courtyard of our compound to pray for a safe journey, a sense of God’s presence, and a request that He move on the heart of the U.S. Consular, at the U.S. Embassy, who would either deny or grant visas to Abdu and Robert before 9 AM. It has been reported that less than 10 percent of applicants for visas are given them from this Embassy. We were also taking Chad and Quaid Hair back to Entebbe so that they could return to Idaho and two hours later picking up Chad’s wife, Syd, and her 14 year old daughter Jayde and her 14 year old friend, Savannah.It is here that I must let Pam tell that story. Pam?Thanks so much for your prayers and support with many invitations for our two team members to come to the U.S. this summer. Today was the day for us to go the the U.S. Embassy in Kampala to make the request.I'll give you the details, for those that want them, but I'll tell you outright that they were both denied their applications. Again! Even though this is the first time this year that they have applied, we all were really expecting that this time they would get an acceptance. We were all so very disappointed. Both Robert and Abdu took it very well. It was Paul who was having the most trouble.You know, over the past months as we have lived here with Abdu and have had many opportunities to be with Robert, we have talked a lot about what this summer will be like for them in the U.S. And we have spent much time trying to prepare them for the culture that they will be exposed to in the U.S., talking about all the foods, teasing them about there being NO matooke in the U.S., wondering if they'll want to drive a car, swim in our pool, and just trying to broaden their base of understanding of what they have never experienced and don't know they are missing. But this morning as we were praying in the driveway before we entered the vehicle that would take us to the Embassy, I had a short picture of zooming out from the spot where we were standing, much like a close up shot of any spot on earth that would then zoom to outer space on Google Earth. I immediately realized that this moment was not about us and getting visas at the Embassy, but it was about God and His plan for each of us this day, and the big picture that only He knows completely. I also realize that my feelings of disappointment are not quite as tender as Robert and Abdu's feelings. But the truth, as I shared it at lunch, was that we could not celebrate getting visa's and planning a trip to the U.S., but we could still celebrate the goodness of God in our lives and the fact that His purpose still remain. We are each committed to His purpose in our lives, and we have no reason to believe that He is not still working that out.Pam was helpful to each of us, but especially me. I am grateful for night … not because it can bring closure to a day of disappoint or perceived defeat … but, because the morning follows it. God has promised that His mercies are new EVERY morning. I have enjoyed those mercies today and I stand ready to watch His amazing victory in my life each day. How knows? Maybe God is already at work, doing something so far beyond my effort, to still arrange visas for those men!

(The photo above is Moses - Abdu's youngest, Abdu and chicks, and me carrying chicks)

"When You are in Africa..."

2008-03-17T05:15:00.003-06:00

One of the first questions out of Paul’s mouth during breakfast yesterday morning was, “So what is the main thing to remember while in Africa?” Quaid spouted out, “DON’T Drive!” - true, but buzz, wrong answer. “Don’t drink the water” advised Pam - right - but buzz, wrong answer again. Paul, to the rescue, stated, “The main thing to remember when you are in Africa is that YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!” You may think you know, but you don’t. What is, isn’t. What seems wrong is right. Up is down. So, with that simple yet heavy word of instruction, I have tried to posture myself to simply observe and not make judgments and to have a teachable and submitted heart.

Uganda has been an awesome experience so far. I have to keep pinching myself to realize that I am really here. Yesterday, the Hunter’s hosted a Marriage Conference. Grace (the cook - more on her later), Alice, a couples of teens, and I prepared lunch for over 50 people. Fried chicken, potatoes, carrots, cabbage, rolls, and pineapple - all prepared and cooked outside over charcoal. Grace truly is amazing, lol. It rained just as we started serving people their meal, but it was a nice refreshing rain that cooled off the air and then let up. All of the couples were very blessed by the conference. It was a ton of work - everything here takes effort and nothing is convenient - but was certainly rewarding.

After folks went home, those of us at Next Generation went out to dinner at “Ling Ling’s”. Hilarious to have 5 Americans and 3 Africans going out for Chinese while in Africa (all stuffed into one sedan BTW!) We had a great relaxing evening just enjoying each other’s company and reflecting on the Lord’s goodness and provision. Even though I don’t know anything, I know Mukama Mulugi - God is Good.

PS - please see slideshow for a few new photos - there would be more but I went out today without my memory card :-(

Uganda!

2008-03-15T06:25:00.007-06:00

Just a quick post to let everyone know that I arrived early this morning (12:30 am) in Entebbe, Uganda. My flights went great - the best I have ever had. Pam and Charles (the driver) picked me up and then we drove 3 hours home to Jinja. I must say I was on the edge of my seat most the way home - I don't think there are any traffic laws here. It is a free for all and if someone else is bigger, you'd better get out of the way! It was similar to Malaysia traffic, only about 10 times more dangerous.

This morning I was awakened by the sounds of birds and (?'s) outside my window. There was a delightful sunrise and the temperature was perfect. It was a busy morning, as Paul and Pam are hosting a couple's retreat tomorrow and have much to prepare. I helped set up a tent inside the compound that will hold about 60 people. They start at 9am tomorrow and will feed everyone lunch.

I've been to town already twice today - once with Paul and Abdu to the bank and then again with Pam and Grace to buy groceries at the open market. We rode "boda boda's" - I loved it! A boda boda is basically a bike taxi. You sit on the back and they take you where you need to go. The open market was quite the experience - so many colors, sounds, smells. Unfortunately I didn't take my camera on that trip - I will have to post those pics later. The two pictures above are views just outside the compound gate.

I will write more details later. I am so blessed to be here!

Blogging

2008-03-10T22:44:00.002-06:00

This blogging experience is not unlike a relationship. I am finding it somewhat difficult to express all that is in my heart and articulate the thoughts in my head. It is almost as if I am developing a level of comfort and trust before I can become more vulnerable in my writing expressions. It is rather strange for me to feel this way, because writing is so much easier for me than speaking. Expressing myself through the written word has almost always come with ease, not unlike turning on a water facet. Perhaps I am uncertain of my audience - although I only know of one at this point and she has already heard my guts spill on various occasions. Maybe it is a hesitancy to step out of my comfort zone where no one reads what I write. On any occasion, I am hoping that this exercise of writing will bring out the best of what I want to express and share and that any skill I have would only be strengthened through this discipline.

The Hunters

2008-03-09T19:44:00.006-06:00

This is the dear couple I will be staying with while in Uganda.
Check out their website at Next Generation Ministries. This site will give you a good feel for Uganda and their ministry in that nation. It also has maps, FAQ's, and even music. Enjoy!

Preparations

2008-03-06T10:17:00.004-07:00

It just hit me this morning - next week at this time I will be thousands of miles up in the air, not to mention heading thousands of miles away from home. As my friend puts it, I am "whelmed over", lol. My mom is coming today to pick up my horse and take him to her house. I won't have any one here that can feed him everyday for three weeks, plus I am almost out of hay. I think he likes it better in the mountains anyway. I need to pick up my malaria pills, unpack my summer clothes (do I still fit in them??? yikes!), write checks for upcoming bills to pay while I am away, etc...

But I guess more than physical preparation, which I know will eventually come together, I am more concerned about spiritual preparation. Have I prayed enough into this trip? Have I interceded effectively for the purposes of God? Am I ready to enter into a new culture and spiritual dynamic? Am I sensitive to the Holy Spirit's voice? Do I even have anything to give to the Ugandan people? Regardless of the answers, I know that ultimately it is Jesus that has called me and He is faithful to complete what He has started. My heart is His and even though I am terribly inadequate, He is more than sufficient and able to establish all that is in His heart. I am so thankful that He invites me to participate and join with Him.

Someone told me that God will often take someone to Africa to do something in their heart that He can do nowhere else. Interesting thought, and probably very true. I pray that God will capture more and more of my heart and life each day and what people will see is more of Him and less of me.

One of my Favorite Places to Hang Out....

2008-03-04T21:01:00.004-07:00

Journal Excerpt 2005

2008-03-02T21:30:00.004-07:00

I was going through some of my online journaling from 3 years ago and ran across this. Maybe it would encourage someone else as well.

January 27, 2005
Father,
I come with my heart seeking to give you a thank offering. What is it that you desire from me? What can I offer that will bring you pleasure? Stir up the gift that is inside of me that you want.

“Oh give thanks to the Lord, call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples. Sing to Him, sing praises to Him; Speak of all His wonders. Glory in His holy name; Let the heart of those who seek the Lord be glad. Seek the Lord and His strength; Seek His face continually. Remember His wonders which He has done.” Psalm 105:1-5

My Daughter,
Carry a thankful heart at all times. Do not be afraid to call out to Me. Tell of what you know about Me. Lift up your worship in song and music. Let the words from your mouth tell of My faithfulness to you. Do not keep it a secret. Allow your heart to be glad and expect good things. Do not quench those little “flutters” of joy in your heart that randomly break forth. Seek Me with all of your heart. Run to Me first. Remember how I have met you in the past. It is a heart style that I desire from you. Man looks on the out ward appearance, but I look on the heart. Do not gauge your experience of Me based on what you feel but on what you know as truth. In the past, you have sought to please Me based on your performance. Don’t seek to perform for Me. Know that I delight in who you are, not what you do. I know that you know all this, but you are so hard on yourself when you feel that you haven’t met My expectations. Your walk has not been in vain. I have seen your heart. No more fear of failing or missing out. The launching pad is being built under your feet. You don’t have to go out and find it. At the same time, be free to fly and explore your world. Don’t launch out just yet, do what is at your hand and opportunity will come to you. Do what you can do now, and the opportunities will come to you. Hold on to material possessions lightly, don’t become weighted down with "stuff". Be full of joy and laughter. Come to the high places with Me, My little "Much Afraid", who is well on her way to becoming "Grace and Glory."